Wild second child syndrome

As a second born myself, I used to try and gain sympathy with the old line about Middle Child Syndrome. The middle child was the forgotten child. We weren¡¯t special like the first born, nor lovingly gazed on like the baby of the family.? We were nothing special.?

Now that I¡¯ve got kids, I realise this was just being a brat.

But with two young boys of my own - I¡¯d like to present you with another syndrome that I know to be true ¨C I¡¯m calling it the WILD SECOND CHILD SYNDROME.?

Almost every parent I know agrees. Their second born is, well, there¡¯s no other way to put it - they¡¯re nutbags!

They¡¯re such free spirits. Such risk takers. Or is that just a nice way of saying they do what they want and don¡¯t listen to you!?!

My girlfriends and I theorise that it¡¯s because your second child pretty much raises themselves. No longer just lavishing attention (or struggling to cope!) with one child ¨C your attention and time are now divided between two kids. Let alone when a third one comes into the picture.? And that¡¯s before you¡¯ve even glanced at your partner.

Think about your own experiences.? With the first child ¨C you¡¯re RoboMum! You¡¯re paranoid about everything. You¡¯re convinced you are actually going to break this child. You sterilize EVERYTHING! You read every parenting book you can get your hands on. You stress over milestone, sleep times. You do the baby gym thing. You join mother¡¯s groups. You make homemade foods. (Okay, I did this twice). You diligently fill out your baby book. You go to the park. You stress over pre-schools. With your first child, every waking moment is about them, their growth and their development.

But the second born, well, sometimes it feels like they¡¯ve pretty much taken care of themselves. You¡¯re just so busy with a toddler and a baby. There¡¯s no way you can lavish the same attention. ?Sterilizing? What¡¯s that?!?! You pick up dummies from the floor and pray the three second rule is actually a thing. ?

I vividly remember teaching my first born colours and numbers. But, if I¡¯m honest, I don¡¯t know that I can say the same for the second. He just seemed to absorb it somehow.

Is it lack of one-on-one attention that creates WILD SECOND CHILD SYNDROME? Or is that the way they were just meant to be?

I don¡¯t think you can blame yourself. You just do the best you can do with what you¡¯ve got - and know you¡¯re not alone.

Now, if you¡¯ll excuse me. I have to go and get a soccer ball off the roof.

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