Should you give your engagement ring and wedding band back after divorce? Three jewellery experts weigh in
By Maddison Leach|
It's an age-old question that has been dividing couples for decades; should a woman give back her engagement ring after a divorce?
Many argue that it's the right thing to do, but a growing number of Australian women (and men) say women shouldn't be expected to hand their rings back when a relationship ends.
To get to the bottom of the debate, 9honey spoke with three local jewellers - and surprisingly, they all had similar takes on the controversial question.
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Larsen Jewellery co-founder Lars Larsen understands why it's such a tricky question, but believes a woman should be able to do what she likes with her engagement ring after a divorce.
"An engagement ring is a gift with conditions, or a sort of promise that a marriage will happen," he explains.?
"Once two people get married, the promise represented by the ring has been fulfilled (no matter the length of the marriage) so technically the receiver of the ring can do whatever they like with it.
"Whoever gets the rings should feel free to keep, sell or remodel the rings however they like. For some people, remodelling can be an excellent way to move on."
Rebecca Klodinsky, co-founder of The Prestwick Place, agrees that women deserve the right to choose if they keep their rings or not.
"If a woman feels that [keeping the ring] is the right thing for her, if it's something she wants to do in order for her to heal, grow or express herself, I believe her decision should be supported, not chastised," she says.?
"A breakup is hard enough."?
Even journalist-turned-jewellery mogul Talitha Cummins agrees women should be allowed to keep their rings.
"I think it's purely a personal preference and depends on the circumstances [but] if it's something that's gifted to you, is it not your right to keep it?" The Cut Jewellery founder tells 9honey.?
And about 70 per cent of her Instagram followers agree, according to a poll she conducted recently.
When asked if engagement rings should be handed back after divorce, many of Cummin's followers said "no".
The only major exception was if the ring was an heirloom or family piece, which most respondents agreed should be returned to the original owner.
"If it is a family ring/stone, then irrespective of whether it is an engagement or marriage that has ended, it is considerate to offer it back," one commenter said.
But what if the couple never even walked down the aisle?
Opinions were mixed when it came to broken off engagements, with some people saying the ring should be given back because the marriage never actually happened.
"Agree with giving back if an engagement is called off, but not once you're married. It's a gift," one wrote, to which another countered, "It's a conditional gift."
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Many agreed that if a woman does keep her engagement and/or wedding rings after a split, she should have the pieces redesigned into something new.
'Divorce rings' have been around for decades, but are getting more attention than ever since Emily Ratajkowski shared hers with her 30 million Instagram followers last week.
While many women praised the model for being so open about moving on from her split from ex-husband Sebastian Bear-McClard, some of Cummins' followers weren't convinced.
"Have it redesigned, but calling it a divorce ring is wrong. Your life with that person has ended, so why still keep attachment to them?" one wrote.?
Another penned: "Love the idea of it being redesigned, but not the idea of a 'divorce ring.'"
So there you have it; experts agree that, in most cases,? a woman has every right to keep her engagement ring when a relationship ends.
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